March 27, 2005

stairwell accompaniment:Turin Brakes- Rain City

My heart feels encumbered tonight. Laden with the reality of the (profound) effect we have on each others lives. With some it’s a matter of hours, days and my life is changed because of the intermingling of our lives…and with the others it is can be years before I conceptualize what part of me they have become. And I’m driving in my car tonight (under the blanket of stars I had asked for today!) and I’m wondering how exactly I became this Amber? It’s this cosmic sequence of events that I could never have predicted (and still it’s difficult for me to fathom how He is shaping me). But I am heavy because of the effect I know I have on them, too.
God, be my portion. It’s grace that draws me near.

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